I came across a recipe that required pickled red onions.
Turns out you can’t find these things at a grocery store. I searched everywhere. Pickled cabbage, picked red cabbage, pickled pearl onions, pickled peppers (try saying that 5 times fast), pickles….no pickled red onions.
Why are there no pickled red onions? Why? Is it because there isn’t a demand for them? Is it too weird? Time consuming? Frustrating?
These are serious questions.
Which means I have to find a recipe for the bloody things. Which I’m fine with. No big deal.
Until I found out this is a time consuming process of evilness. Ain’t nobody got time that. Shee-it. (Yeah, might have been watching too many pop culture youtube videos)
I don’t have time to simmer, vinegar, boil jars, vacuum seal, spice, and what have you. I need a quick easy 5 minutes tops and you are done version.
And then after hours of scouring the internet. I found it. Bahahahaha. And it was glorious. And the angels and archangels bowed down singing praises of hallelujah in hip hopera form while having one hand up on their ear while the other hand is waving around all sassy like Mariah Carey in the middle of a vocal riff. There was a backbeat. Maybe a beat boxer. (Yeah, definitely been watching too much youtube)
Quick Pickle Onions
3/4 cup red wine vinegar
1 tablespoon sugar
1 teaspoon salt
1/2 red onion, thinly sliced
Find a old pickle jar that your husband always leaves in the bloody fridge that no longer has pickled whatever cuz he ate them all. (Oh, your husband doesn’t do that. That must be nice. Mine does. Pisses me off. But now, I found a use for all those evil empty jars full of pickled liquid)
Clean this jar until it no longer smells of pickles, banana peppers, olives, whatever.
In a small bowl, combine red wine vinegar with sugar and salt; stir until dissolved.
Place onion slices in a glass jar.
Pour the vinegar mixture over the onions, seal, and refrigerate overnight.
Makes 1 thing of pickled red onions. Calories: 78, Carbohydrates: 19 grams, Sugar: 13 grams, Fiber: 2 grams, Protein: 2 grams.
Badabing badaboom, you are done before you know it. Super easy, super fast.
Now I know what you are thinking. Overnight? That’s it?
Yeah. I was thinking that too. But it works. And it’s amazing.
The red wine vinegar gives it an extra oomph. Do not use white wine vinegar. I’m serious, only the red. You want that extra flavor. You want your taste buds to do the Macarena in your mouth. I hate pickled things except pickles, but I loved these pickled red onions.
My husband fell in love with these red onion. Yummy was the word he used.
It goes great in salsa, tacos, fajitas, on it’s own, chicken and rice.
Wanna be fancy, or rather sophisticated, for Cinco de Mayo – make these. Pair it with some pork carnitas street tacos using a corn tortilla and this will be the life of the party. And people will be all, where on earth did you get these and you can smile a sneaky smile and say something like it’s my abuela’s abuelas recipe. That way they know it’s a secret because it’s been passed down two generations of abuelas even though you’re white and have no abuelas.
But you’ll know and I’ll know, you did this in a jiffy like a pro the night before.